I am by no means a writer, and I’ve been having trouble coming up with the “right” words for this post. So I’m just going to start typing. Please bear with me…
I met Georgia online about 4 years ago. I’ll always remember the wordy comment she left on one of my blog posts and immediately feeling like I connected with her. At the time she was newly pregnant with her first baby, one that her and her husband had waited a very long time for. She was getting older and had pretty much accepted the fact that she may never have children and then Isaac came along. A beautiful baby boy. I was blessed to meet with her and Isaac twice the past few years while in Chicago.
Then this past spring Georgia emailed me with exciting news. She was pregnant again. She was thrilled. Because of her age and difficulty having Isaac, she was surprised and delighted and I, of-course, was so happy for her. Georgia is an an amazing mama. I was praising God that He was giving her the second child that she so desired.
And this is where it all gets hard. Really hard. I don’t know how else to put it. Where things go wrong and where an ultrasound shows that Georgia’s baby has a severe birth defect and where an amniocentesis confirms that her baby girl has Trisomy 18. As a labor and delivery nurse I know what Trisomy 18 means. I knew when I cried with Georgia on the phone what it meant for her baby girl. I won’t go into all of the details, but at some point during her pregnancy or shortly after birth, Georgia will lose her baby girl.
And this is where I freeze. Where I don’t know what to write because the tears just keep flowing. Where I ache for my friend and long to rescue her from the daily grief she is going through. She is carrying this baby as long as God allows. She is constantly feeling her baby move inside her, knowing that this is her chance to hold her. She is hurting, really hurting, yet she has this amazing trust and peace in God that blows me away. Sure, she has gone through the grief cycle multiple times and will continue to do so. But it all circles back to the fact that she knows He cares for her and this baby. Lord bless them.
I met her for coffee last week while I was in Chicago. We sat and cried together, we prayed together. And we talked about how God sometimes decides to deliver us through something rather than deliver us from it. I can’t explain why. And that’s really worthless. But I know I love a God that is loving. I know that He restores. I know that He holds us and has purpose for us. I know He places people in our path at certain points in our life to help us through stuff. (And this post couldn’t have come at a better time. It’s a good one to read if you are suffering or know someone that is.) Georgia has a faith that is strong, but she and her family need our prayers right now. It’s hard, so very hard.
She asked me if I could take some photos of her while in Chicago. She has chosen to embrace this pregnancy, even in the midst of the pain. She gave me permission to share her story and these photos because she told me that if there was another woman in her situation she thought it might be an encouragement to her. Lord use it. And now my keyboard is all wet and I just can’t type anymore….